If you aren’t feeling up to the holidays, fake it for the sake of your loved ones. That was my family’s advice after we had had a death in October. At Christmas we must give gifts of love and time.
Thank you Diane! As hubby and I celebrated our 17th Anniversary on Friday we had a small dinner & too much dessert. We discussed how this year will be an even smaller holiday than the last two. We will head out for dinner on the 21st for my birthday. Then he is not working for the first in MANY YEARS. It will be just the two of us this year. Any extended family we usually spend time with will be in Singapore. So we have decided to have a quiet day together celebrating how lucky we are to have found each other later in life, how we both were unhappy until then and we will also remember just how much we lost once I got sick, but how the thing we did not lose was “Us”. We may have less in the material sense of the word, but we have had 17 years of respect, friendship and love. If I am feeling up to it we may visit an assisted living facility close to home and see who needs a Family for the holidays. As plans are also something we laugh at, everything is spur of the moment for us. If I’m not having a good day then we will spend it together, listening to music and taking family naps - I am so grateful to have this man in my life. He could have walked away as I gave him the chance to- he will be beside me no matter what happens.
Be grateful everyone, as we all have at least one thing we should be grateful for if we truly look.
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Lives - it is inside us all.
Beautifully said, Pamela. The happiness is inside, and your are blessed to be with your husband. I likewise will spend the holidays quietly enjoying my husband’s company while our few family members are kicking up their holiday heels elsewhere. It’s all good, and we love quiet time. Have a lovely holiday💚🎄💙❤️
We hang grandpa’s stocking and fill it with “love notes” from the grandkids. We tell stories and share memories. Too many others I know have lost spouses near the holidays and I ask to see thejr pictures, ask about them. We must always ask and tell and share...it’s welcome and an honor for those left behind. Don’t be afraid of hurting, or reminding or causing tears. Thanks Diane, for this loving piece about open hearts and empathy. Beautifully said.
Thanks, Joan. I love the idea of filling the stocking with the children’s love notes. You are so right about the therapy of talking about the missing loved one--tears with love are healthy. Have a great Christmas!🎄
Thank you for this wonderful reminder. My family has many loved ones who left us during the tough times of winter, and I am helped by reminders to name them, and celebrate them all as gone for a time but not forgotten...
Thank you Diane! As hubby and I celebrated our 17th Anniversary on Friday we had a small dinner & too much dessert. We discussed how this year will be an even smaller holiday than the last two. We will head out for dinner on the 21st for my birthday. Then he is not working for the first in MANY YEARS. It will be just the two of us this year. Any extended family we usually spend time with will be in Singapore. So we have decided to have a quiet day together celebrating how lucky we are to have found each other later in life, how we both were unhappy until then and we will also remember just how much we lost once I got sick, but how the thing we did not lose was “Us”. We may have less in the material sense of the word, but we have had 17 years of respect, friendship and love. If I am feeling up to it we may visit an assisted living facility close to home and see who needs a Family for the holidays. As plans are also something we laugh at, everything is spur of the moment for us. If I’m not having a good day then we will spend it together, listening to music and taking family naps - I am so grateful to have this man in my life. He could have walked away as I gave him the chance to- he will be beside me no matter what happens.
Be grateful everyone, as we all have at least one thing we should be grateful for if we truly look.
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Lives - it is inside us all.
Beautifully said, Pamela. The happiness is inside, and your are blessed to be with your husband. I likewise will spend the holidays quietly enjoying my husband’s company while our few family members are kicking up their holiday heels elsewhere. It’s all good, and we love quiet time. Have a lovely holiday💚🎄💙❤️
You as well ❤️
We hang grandpa’s stocking and fill it with “love notes” from the grandkids. We tell stories and share memories. Too many others I know have lost spouses near the holidays and I ask to see thejr pictures, ask about them. We must always ask and tell and share...it’s welcome and an honor for those left behind. Don’t be afraid of hurting, or reminding or causing tears. Thanks Diane, for this loving piece about open hearts and empathy. Beautifully said.
What a wonder way to share memories ❤️
Sorry I typed with the wrong hand 😂
What a WONDERFUL way to share ... ✌🏻💐
Thanks, Joan. I love the idea of filling the stocking with the children’s love notes. You are so right about the therapy of talking about the missing loved one--tears with love are healthy. Have a great Christmas!🎄
Thank you for this wonderful reminder. My family has many loved ones who left us during the tough times of winter, and I am helped by reminders to name them, and celebrate them all as gone for a time but not forgotten...
Thank you. Celebrating their lives and sharing anecdotal stories is healing. Peace💙🎄